Men finally admit to being bullied by their exes over child access, money and love

You may also like...

31 Responses

  1. Peter Davies says:

    Hi Leigh
    Thank you for highlighting some important issues. Unfortunately s76 of the Serious Crimes Act 2015 applies to only a very narrow set of circumstances that excludes most targetted parents in cases of PA. There can be no doubt that witholding or severing contact between a parent and child ranks amongst the worst and most coercive things that one human being can do to another. However, the definition of the offence of coercive control is so narrow that it is of little or no use to most alienated children and parents.

    In order to convict someone of the offense they must either be in an intimate personal relationship with the partner OR living together AND members of the same family OR living together and they have previously been in an intimate personal relationship with each other.

    Since most alienated parents are neither in intimate relationships with their former partners nor living under the same roofs as their ex’s they fall at the first hurdles in considerig a prosecution under the offense.

    The law has been deliberately drafted to apply to only a select set of circumstances and to exclude most parents and children who are victims of PA. It is a disgrace and, as the study shows, millions of child abusers and domestic abusers have been let off the hook.

  2. andrea says:

    Richard White Finally ? It’s been exposed for years and nothing gets done about it expect men get Police warning letters for exposing the abuse this is fact. And yes I have exposed the abuse.

  3. andrea says:

    Kausar Ramzan I know how dad’s feel as i am the person at the receiving end of too

  4. andrea says:

    Jack John Webber Its even worst when that terror is enhanced by a not fit for purpose family court…

  5. andrea says:

    Johnny Mellinger Yes.. Its horrible. In the end it mostly hurts the kid and changes them as well.

  6. andrea says:

    Peter Charles Smith This disgraceful behaviour has been covered up for decades.

  7. andrea says:

    Jason Ponting Peter Charles Smith yep the police and the family court refuse to accept it

  8. andrea says:

    Jason Ponting Peter Charles Smith yep the police and the family court refuse to accept it
    Steve Monaro Perhaps we need an offence of coercive behaviour in Australia too, though it would be difficult to prove I’d imagine. It’s sad and worrying that society has come to a point where the criminal law is being called upon to adjudicate on personal relationships.

  9. andrea says:

    Ben admit it? I’ve been jumping up and down trying to draw it to the attention of the police, dcp, csa, mediation, phsycologists and the courts. No one will believe that this could even be possible when she turns on the water works and plays the victim. A 6 foot, medium built male has no rights and no avenue of recourse to the lies and verbal and physical violence perpetrated in the name of ‘protecting the children’ aka alienation.🤬

  10. andrea says:

    Bart I have been admitting for years that my ex bullies me but no one wants to believe it except the very few who see it happening

  11. andrea says:

    Chesky Cick A pitty the judges can’t work that out ….. but the family court play into it along with some SEW’s

  12. andrea says:

    Steve Monaro Chesky Cick : The problem is that judges can’t do anything without evidence. If men don’t complain and put it in affidavits, then nothing will happen.

  13. andrea says:

    Dallas McBrien Shouldn’t it read “Women finally admit to bullying their exes”?

  14. andrea says:

    James Lowe Finally?

  15. andrea says:

    Darren Rowe James Lowe it’s not easy for lots of men for lots of reasons why men don’t speak up

  16. andrea says:

    Barry Bertossa Finally admit??? lt has been happening since before the CSA was hatched. The legal system has favoured the perceived victim for decades and has empowered them and their legal representatives to lie, cheat, deceive, and ultimately abuse the ones they claim to love and protect, the innocent kids who get caught up in the crossfire.

  17. andrea says:

    Alan Gill At last it is being recognized that men can and are being physically emotionally and psychologicaly abused. And that the children are used as a weapon against dads. This is not about gender bashing but about getting a balanced perspective on family violence

  18. andrea says:


  19. Fred says:

    And scientists have only ‘just discovered’ the invention of the wheel. This has been going on for a long time but the legal system, the govts and the media love to portray women as the victims and men have to juat grin and bare it like… well… ‘a man’.

  20. Andrew says:

    What’s this “finally”?
    I was reporting the crap I had to deal with to police over 20 years ago and nothing was done except for me, the actual VICTIM being arrested and charged for what SHE was doing!

  21. SB says:

    I am a father to a son I cannot see. Not only because of circumstances with mother but also because we are from different countries. I am Canadian and she is born in the UK along with our son.
    I have been threatened with not seeing my child for months, been told if I don’t sent more money then I will not see my child, that if I argue with her and validate my own feelings towards her I will not see my child.

    She knew getting into the relationship with me that it would be hard when we had to deal woth seperation by law and immigration. But she stayed in the UK when my visa ended instead of following the original plan we set to move back and forth as needed until we were able to settle permanently in the UK.

    Now I’m in Canada over a year without my child. His 3rd birthday passed in March 28th and I got nothing. Didn’t get to see him at all. I work 7 days a week and save 85% of all my earnings to afford the visa I need to get back to the UK. On top of all this I was recently diagnosed with testicular cancer and have had an orchiectomy to remove it. I have been told by my ex that I am lying about it to garner attention

  22. Jo says:

    I support this. Not content with trying to emotionally and financially destroy my partner, his ex wife attacks me too and there’s very little legally I can do about it. It’s the kids I feel sorry for being subjected to her unwarranted, continual vitriol about their dad and I, who they both love. Kids are little people, not the possessions she treats them as. Mumsnet and the school gates fuel the hate.

  23. Philip Walsh says:

    My ex turned after she got in a new relationship. I had an amicable relationship before in which l provided money for my daughter and free non legal access. I have not seen my 8 yr daughter since boxing day 2017. Apparently she does not want to see me so tough. My ex then went to the csa and managed to get 90 pence more than what l was previously paying freely. She has lost more as l payed for clothes , shool uniforms etc now l don’t. On top of all this my father is barred from seeing her because my daughter , allegedly doesn’t want to see him so tough. The final nail was driven in when ( l have close contact with the school so l can watch from afar) when the school told me my daughters surname is the same as the mother’s. I wasn’t present at the registration due to working. It will cost thousands to get legal access and there is a big chance my daughter will still not want to see me. Just to add, l pay the csa because to not do so l would have had to say my daughter was not mine and could not, will not and never abandon my child. I write this to highlight that absent dad’s are prevented from seeing their children because in my view, the children are being abused mentally. It’s downright evil.

  24. What do you mean “Finally”? I’ve detailed this for years. Diarised it in my book, Access Denied.
    David E. Gates.

  25. Daniel Richards says:

    No matter where we are in the world. The family court empower women and treat the man as if he is everything that is said about him, until he proves it otherwise. Women know this or are made aware by lawyers, so they can manipulate the system in their favour. I have been treated like a criminal for the past 9 months and only aloud to see my child for 90 minutes in a public place which is actually a cafe. My poor girl is to young to understand and the mother continues to use her as a bargaining chip, claiming anything she can, to hold control over me. It is very upsetting to see that this is a normal and natural occurrence these days and the man is in no way treated as an equal parent.

  26. Louise says:

    My partner is always being bullied by his ex. She tells him hes a bad dad and he’s not a man. There’s threats of violence on top of he tries to see them. It’s always if you don’t do this you’ll never see your kids again, or if you don’t do that…They’ve been separated 11 years and now she’s cut him off from his daughters. The girls and he are devestated. It’s been 5 months since we’ve seen them.

  27. Louise says:

    It also stops them seeing their 3year old sister. She misses them so much

  28. robert says:

    i have exsperience the same while living with my ex n after. separated she dont let me see my daughter like im supose to wen we first separated she made me wait a year befor seeing her again .

  29. Philip says:

    “Give me more money or I’ll take the kids from you.” Sadly… I’ve heard that before . I wanted to be in my childrens lives. They’re all nearly grown now and it has been a difficult and painful road, but my oldest children see right through it now. Of course they love their mother and I have never stood in the way or discouraged that, but they do see that they’ve been lied to and used as pawns.

    Suicide rates for middle aged fathers that are denied access to their beloved children is appalling.

  30. Art says:

    There’s no ‘finaly ‘ about it
    Men have been yelling this from the rooftops for almost as long as I’ve been alive, and I’m 52
    Society’s pretty much Universal answer? ” shut up and pay, you deadbeat!”

Leave a Reply

Your e-mail address will not be published. Required fields are marked *