Love and horror! Henry’s classic reasons for opposites to attract
Henry is from Ireland but has lived in Sydney for 27 years. He runs a syndicated international three hour weekly radio chat show, BondiTunes, which appears on RTI.fm and a number of other stations around the world
Myself and the GF are completely the opposite. We often joke about this. We’ve been together for a long time. She is from Australia and grew up with Australian culture. I am from the other side of the planet (Ireland – with a different culture, although these cultures are not all that different!)
She is a morning person. I am nocturnal. She reads a lot. I don’t read at all. She is a writer. I am a talker (broadcaster). You could never ever get her in front of a microphone! She loves food. I eat simply to live. I am the (rather loud) centre of any party.
She prefers to talk one on one quietly. Interestingly, at parties we rarely talk to each other, because of the above. We have often joked about how some people think we never talk to each other! Because neither of us go to pubs, or restaurants (in my case) we spend a lot of time at home, and we talk a lot. Probably more than most couples.
She is very astute with money. I am useless with money.
She is a very well researched writer. I am a dangerously “open” broadcaster. She is scared of horror movies. I LOVE horror movies! She loves classical music. I know nothing about classical music.
When she puts a number of letters in a mail box, she will carefully put them in one at a time. I shove them all in together (this was NOT robbed from the movie “when Harry met Sally” – which showed a scene like this – this is true!). She parks the car very carefully. I park recklessly!
She can sleep through a nuclear war. I can’t sleep if there’s a fly in the room. She can withstand intense heat and humidity. I tend to shrivel up and die in such conditions.
She doesn’t complain out loud when she has a problem with things. I scream from the rooftops.
She was tertiary educated with a degree (or maybe two). I barely made it through high school. She comes from a very close large happy family (one of 7 children). I come from a small broken family (one of 3).
The thing is, we have one major thing in common. We have exactly the same sense of humour. Some would say that if you are together long enough that you do develop the same characteristics, such as same sense of humour. That’s true, but not in our case. We laughed at the very same things from day one. Oh! Day one of our long relationship, we met in a gay niteclub at 2am…she never went to niteclubs – was just forced by a friend! I lived in niteclubs! Thank goodness for that, or I would have never met her.
WE DO HAVE SOME THINGS IN COMMON!
Okay. We DO have other things in common. We love good comedic or quality drama films. We love doing long drives around Australia. We love animals. We love walking. We love drinking red wine (ha ha!). WE LOVE CAMPING!!!!!!! She loves that I drive thousands of kilometres in Australia so she can just chill out.
We both love solving problems. She will not stop until she has solved a storyline issue when she writes. I will not stop until I have fixed a technical problem.
About 20 years ago when we first knew each other a male friend of hers (who was probably jealous) noted that- from day one I would call the GF about 14 times a day. This is true, Mobile phones were new, we did not live together so we called each other all the time. He said to us one day to try and take the piss “You guys must call each other 20 times a day” and I said “Yes, unless we’ve had a row, then only 18 times a day”. That shut the little fukker up!
We were both brought up Presbyterian (go figure…a small sub-section of the Protestant religion on opposite sides of the planet).
Neither of us give each other presents at Christmas, birthdays, Valentines Day, or any other time. Neither of us care about material things (in relationship to each other). We are enough for each other each day. Neither of us care about fashion. We both believe that there is no need to buy “stuff”.
But the most important thing about us two is that we have the same sense of humour. Don’t underestimate that. It is SO important in any relationship. That is why we often joke about our differences. Very often.
I can’t really speak on behalf the GF on this, but I actually think that we are both so incredibly greatful for our lives, not just because we are together, but for our lives full stop.
The irony of this is that neither of us are “lonely” people. I lived alone for many years..it never bothered me, yet we were afforded the luxury of finding each other a long time ago. I almost feel guilty of that, because there are so many lonely people in the world.
Would I be lonely now if I had not met her, given my age now? Possibly. I doubt it though, but simply don’t know, because I have not experienced that at this age. One thing I do know is – if she suddenly disappeared, I would be heartbroken..I am not a romantic person. I am a realist. That is why telling a love story is difficult to write. But I am not the writer. She is.
On February 22, 2017 we celebrated being together for 24 years!